The Observer – Stop trying to be ‘Normal’

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The Observer – 28 September 2014 – Stop trying to be ‘Normal’

Online porn has fired up new desires, and Fifty Shades of Grey has helped break taboos about ‘kinky’ activities. Three experts talk about the issues they are asked to address.

Dr Dmitri Popelyuk, Consultant psychiatrist in psychosexual medicine at the sexuality and gender Clinic at Nightingale Hospital London – “Technology could be making us less sexually adaptable. In our service, we’re seeing an increased exposure to different sexual practices. We’re seeing a kind of ‘sexual super-specialisation’. Twenty years ago, if i had a shoe fetish, it would be quite hard to find someone else with a similar interest, quite an effort to specialise in that one area. today, technology would ‘indulge’ me. there’s online pornography, video rooms with everything to choose from, chat rooms, and apps that allow one to narrow down to one thing at the expense of everything else.”

“A lot of our sexual difficulties are about the discrepancy between what our sex life is and what we imagine it should be. What our sex life ‘Should be’ is is dictated by what we hear through the media, what we see online and hear from our friends. Often, my job is to close the gap – by improving sexual functioning but also bringing down expectation.”

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